There are 13,376 people in town today. That would be the 4th largest city in Alaska. That’s 26,752 eyeballs (ideally) 133,760 fingers (hopefully) 133,760 toes (theoretically) Average Snapchat user opens the app 18 times daily so it will likely be accessed 240,768 times in Ketchikan today. Jack.ramsay just posted him arriving in Ketchikan on a cruise line. Codieannie “making his way downtown, walking fast, faces pass and he’s homebound” at Ketchikan Creek. Ketchikan is light__catcher’s favorite town so far. The average person has seven social media accounts that roughly adds up to 93632 active accounts roaming Ketchikan. The average person spends about two hours on social media each day. If I begged a dollar from each of them, I could fly to the Bahamas ($1441) stay at the British Colonial Hilton Nassau ($186) for 45 nights and back with $3500 for spending money. Or I could take the ferry to Wrangell and back 110 times. If I wanted, I could get berths take all my friends, and go six times. I could buy a 2016 Nissan Versa SV with only 34,000 miles on it. I would be able to pay for one year of college tuition at the University of Nevada in Las Vegas. 1 in 10 people have athlete’s foot making an extra 1,300 people wandering around Ketchikan with it. This is what I think about when Leah stops and lets half the town cross in front of me.
The sun’s out, AP tests are over, and you guessed it! Tourist season has returned! Everyone is figuring out where they are going to work. Some people work behind the counter, some give tours, and others guide visitors across the street. The crossing guards are very important when it comes to tourist season. Without them, tourists would probably get run over regularly. Jacinda Leighton is a returning crossing guard and is ready to take on the challenge again. “You always know something bad could happen in the back of your mind but I try not to let it bother me too much,” Leighton said. “A lot of people can be very rude and not listen, because of that they can put themselves in certain situations. Nobody wants to be responsible if something bad happens which can be tough”. Kiely Bryce had her first day on the job recently and is super excited to be a crossing guard this season. “I heard about [the job] from Jacinda and Leah [Benning] and it seemed fun so I am trying it,” Bryce said. “My first day was good, easier than I thought it would be. I’m really excited to interact with tourists and to get to work outside. I’m not scared but I am aware so I’ll be careful obviously and ready if that time comes.” Leighton has been on the job since last year. Every day usually runs smoothly and no one gets hurt. However, there was once a time where someone almost actually did get hurt. She recalls her one and only close call with tourists and wants to set a standard for future recruits like Bryce. “There was this one time at the end of the day, and I was crossing the road. The tourists already crossed and I was heading back to my post. There was this bus driver who almost hit me and then proceeded to almost hit not only the crossing guard but the tourists at the other post while running through our signs,” said Leighton. “It was really bad. I actually had to push the tourists out of the way. We eventually talked it out with the bus company and reported it.” 2013 Kayhi graduate, Jacob Potts, has been working as a crossing guard for quite some time now. He recently got promoted to Street lead for his 5th season. He loves his job and can’t imagine working anywhere else. The sun coming out is making him ready to get back to work and be with his friends in the outdoors. “All of my friends worked here and with the flexible schedule with good pay. It’s nice to come back here. And as long as your calm, it’s pretty easy and fun,” said Potts. “It can be stressful at some points, miserable in the rain but in the end a ton of fun. The job is easier if your outgoing, talk to the tourists and be funny with them. They love it.”
Ok, you looked online, saw beautiful pictures of clear days, big fish, and whales watching kayakers so you booked your tickets to Ketchikan. Good job. Here’s what you need to know:
The hike to the Deer Mountain trailhead is almost as long and painful as the hike itself. Your khakis and button-ups aren’t going to cut it. Either call a cab to escort you up or forget it. There’s nothing sadder than seeing poor 8-year old Billy being forced up the mountain by his overzealous dad who was a 3rd team all-conference in high school and won’t back down from anything, and mother who looks like a Lululemon model. I have honestly thought about rolling down the window and telling them to turn back now. I never have, partially because it’s entertaining to see how far dad’s gotten on the way back down the hill.
It’s going to rain. Sometimes it rains and rains and rains for 25 hours a day, 8 days a week. Ketchikan averages 229 days of rainfall a year. You may see more rain in the one day you’re here than you’ve seen your entire life. And not that the plastic ponchos aren’t flattering but the locals will make fun of you for wearing it. Zero percent of people look cool while wearing a poncho. So ditch the clear plastic sheath and bring your own coat. This is a rainforest people!
While I’m on apparel. The docks are made of big long boards of wood. There’s a gap between them just big enough for the heel of your stilettos to fall into. So please don’t forget to pack your three-inch heels because I haven’t seen anyone bite it yet and this summer might be my last opportunity to. Shorts are another must. Even if it’s raining sideways you will assert your dominance over everyone by wearing shorts. And don’t even think about packing a hat and gloves because you definitely won’t need them. When everyone is back home telling their stories of their trip to Alaska, they will remember you and wish they were more like you, shorts guy.
Disclaimer, your tour guide cannot summon whales and bears at will. There are no chain link fences in the ocean or the forest, animals can roam wherever they please. The whales and bears don’t care that you paid to go see them. An authentic Alaskan experience isn’t the pictures shown in your brochure.
You will not catch a record-setting King Salmon on your 4-hour charter. Depending on how the season is going, you’ll be lucky to even catch a king. And honestly, once your fish has been processed and packaged none of your neighbors have to know that it’s just a little pinky. Also! In the same way, your whale watching guides can’t magically produce whales, all your captain can do is put four lines in the water and wait. So, don’t bug them about the lack of fish, you’re in Alaska, be grateful.
Hydro flasks are everywhere. No matter where you go, the odds are you’ll see that at least 1 out of every 2 people has a Hydro Flask with them. The question is, what makes these water bottles so popular? Is it the shape? The colors? Junior, Morgan Tiffany loves the fact that Hydro Flasks have the ability to keep cold drinks cold, while also having the ability keep hot drinks hot. “They come in plenty of colors and sizes so you have a lot to choose from,” said Tiffany. “They are really convenient for keeping cold drinks cold for 24 hours AND hot drinks hot for 12 hours. I also like how they come plain and simple that way you can decorate them with whatever stickers you’d like.” One of the most common things you’ll notice on Hydro Flasks are the stickers. By looking at someone’s Hydro Flasks stickers, you can really get an idea of what they are like and what types of things they enjoy. Some people have certain reasonings behind their stickers, and others just don’t really know why they chose them or how they even got them. Junior, Olivia Kinunen got her Hydro Flask stickers from places she’s been and as gifts. “Lots of my family members have given me stickers that I have saved up,” said Kinunen. “I like to get stickers from the different places I’ve traveled as reminders and souvenirs.” Everyone has their own style. For example, lots of Hydro Flasks have an organized decor of stickers on them. But others are randomized and don’t have a specific pattern to them. Sophomore, Shaye Skillings prefers her stickers to be organized and visible for others to see clearly. “I prefer my stickers to be organized so they can all be seen,” said Skillings. “I think the purpose of water bottle stickers is to show personality and certain interests so that is why it is important to make sure they are visible.” Not all Hydro Flasks have stickers though, Some people are different and don’t like to put stickers on a brand new water bottle. Junior, Jenna Miller doesn’t like the cluttered look of stickers on water bottles. “I don’t like stickers on my Hydro Flask because it seems very disorganized,” said Miller. “I like the clean and fresh look of having a plain and simple Hydro Flask opposed to one that is cluttered with stickers.” Hydro flasks have really made their way into our day to day lives. They’re useful, convenient, and fun. They can be used for multiple purposes, and have a wide variety of common colors that most people enjoy. They keep your beverage cold, or hot. And overall are really sturdy water bottles.
The Rotary Interact Daddy-Daughter Dance will be taking place on this Sunday from 2-4 P.M. The dance will be held at Kayhi in the commons. All the proceeds go to TAFCOM, a Tanzanian organization that facilitates community development projects.
The Ketchikan Public Health Center reported that the number of flu cases in Ketchikan has doubled from last year. Ketchikan High School Principal Bob Marshall is fully aware of the problem and wants to take care of it. “Anytime a student misses class, there’s going to be things that they miss that could ultimately cause them to get behind and I know with the current flu, people are out for days.” The Department of Health and Services has taken action and has spread awareness. “The Ketchikan Public Health Center wanted to reach out to the school district about this year’s flu season, the number of confirmed flu cases have double from last year, the entire country is seeing increase cases of flu. It is so important to prevent the flu by vaccination, proper cough etiquette, hand hygiene, and stay home when ill.”
Alert! Alert! Guess what’s coming up y’all… BLACK FRIDAY, or should I say Black FriYAY. Now, you all know that I love to shop. It has gotten to the point where I am seriously considering adding Shopaholic to my name. You know how they say Christmas comes once a year well, I believe that it comes twice. Black Friday is unbelievable. Everything is on sale and if you look close, that Versace Robe might be yours for just a couple of Benjis. Black Friday is somewhat a dangerous event. Relationships are broken, and I guarantee you that that isn’t the only thing broken. People get trampled over and some, well, they see it as a competitive sport. No one, and I repeat NO ONE is your ally when it comes to Black Friday. Everyone wants the same items so you have to keep all the sales to yourself. I never thought I’d say this but, I would honestly sleep in a tent outside of a store if I knew they had an amazing sale on brand items. Trust me I’m not a fan of tents. Even though I live in a small city, as soon as it’s Nov. 24, this girl is going online and is plugging in the numbers. Lord, I could go on and on about Black Friday. Who knows maybe I’ll name my future grandchildren after this holiday, after all aren’t names supposed to have a meaning. I have two tips on how to survive Black Friday. One, don’t ever leave the house without your parents’ credit cards. Two, shop till you drop. But sadly… we live in Ketchikan Alaska. There is no Versace. There is Salmon Landing, but is it even open? I will likely just be at home in bed watching all the Black Friday commercials when the chaos starts and be depressed when it ends, knowing Black Friday is not for me. Yet… There will be a day, who knows when that day will be, when college is over, college is paid off, I have a job, all that stuff, then I can officially become an adult when I can live this glorious holiday to the fullest.